Wednesday, July 18, 2012

The Stripper Housewife re-emerges!!

The Stripper Housewife re-emerges! No longer a wife, but still very much a stripper with a fascination for all things domestic!

Last November my living situation changed drastically…to say the least! My husband of 5 years and I decided to throw in the towel and accept the hard truth that we were, in fact, going to join the ranks of the 50% of marriages that end in divorce. I kept the apartment and he left. It took about a month to get what he needed out of the apartment, and then…there I was, 1 month later with no husband and a house that looked quite literally like the physical manifestation of what had become of our marriage. Like you might be able to assume…my apartment was a disaster. A constant physical reminder of something that had gone horribly, horribly wrong! Nothing had a place; there were boxes and random items strewn across what had at one time been a cozy little apartment. A big change was in order, and FAST! I knew that to be happy in this new phase of my life, a phase that honestly I was pretty excited about, I needed to physically move!

But, in case you don’t know…I live in New York City! Moving in the city is one of the most difficult things you go through as a New Yorker, and on top of a divorce, searching for a new apartment was not on my list of things to do. So, I decided to move into my apartment one more time. I packed all my things into boxes, moved the boxes to the middle of each room, mopped, cleaned every crevice of the place and started to redefine the rooms of my apartment!

Step one however, involved the burning of white sage…a lot of sage…and I mean LOTS! 

The next step was imagining a whole different lay out to the apartment. The bedroom became the living room, his studio became the bedroom, the dining room became my sewing room, and my studio…became every showgirls dream room…the WALK IN CLOSET!

I dreamed of what I wanted my house to be like. This is the first time I’ve ever lived alone and I want it my way.

So, I decided on:

Minimalist 70s porn star living room
Country craft sewing room
Warm Girly bedroom (which, by the way, is only big enough for a bed!)
My kitchen was already perfect, it just need a little editing and simplifying.

And that’s exactly what I did! For only $1000 I got an entirely new apartment that I am proud to have people come over and visit.

Before I could buy furniture, linens, or anything else I had to paint! All of my things were packed up already so it was the perfect time…the perfect time for a party!! I invited a bunch of friends over, blasted some music, bought a few bottles of champagne, lunch and went to town! We painted the entire apartment in about 5 hours! And check out how much fun it was…I have the pictures to prove it!

Painting tips from Strippers:

1. Never wear pants! Why risk getting your clothes covered in paint when you just paint in your panties. So much easier that way! 

2. Your stripper heels will help you reach those spaces up high...remember they give you an extra 7 inches! Just make sure your friend is there to spot you, and use caution while wearing stripper heels on the step stool! 

3. In case you get tired of painting...practice your booty bouncing while you paint!

4. Champagne 

Once the paint was dry the rest was easy. I had already spent a lot of time in my space envisioning exactly how I wanted it; all I needed to do was buy the things in my head. I bought a couch, a rug, all new linens, a new shower curtain, bath mat, big throw pillows and a bookshelf. That’s all it took. Well, that is after donating a lot of old stuff to local charities. Get rid of everything! There is no reason to hold on to old things that you didn't really like to begin with. The more you get rid of, the more space for positive new things to come into your life. 

It’s all about redefining the space, moving things around, taking down everything off the walls and starting over again.

Assess what you have once you pack it away. See what you can do with it that’s new and different. One example: I realized I had a lot of large mirrors in the house so I turned them into a collage of mirrors on one large wall in my living room. It opens up the space, makes it look bigger, and it’s a pretty attractive design. It also allows me to rehearse in that room without it looking like a “dance studio.”

This was the single most important thing I did at the start of my new life. It defined my mood for the next year and has really been the difference in moving forward and loving my new life! Even if you're not going through a break up, redefining your space from time to time allows you to change the energy in your life and help you jump into a new direction. Change is good, dive head first into it! You really have no choice sometimes! 


  1. Me too...but 20 years... :-/ Working on the changes thing...glad to see you back on the blogging wagon. Come to PDX, I'll buy you a beer or two.

  2. I'm a sucker foe house makeover pics :D anywhere I can see more? I would kill for a walk-in closet! <3

  3. Yes! More picts- would love to see the wall of mirrors!

  4. I'm so happy to see how you decided to deal with this HUGE event in your life. You are a class act my dear. Contact me and we'll do lunch or something... (I see champagne being involved no matter what happens.)